Smashed-Rat-on-Press began as a pamphlet series in the late 1970s, and continues today on a whim. Our first publications were on letter size paper, lovingly photocopied and collated by hand, then folded and stapled by hand. Today, we still have no presses of our own, and indeed no place to put a press in our cramped corporate headquarters. These days we farm out printing and fulfillment to Lulu.com, the well-known print-on-demand house. They do a superb job of producing top-notch paperback books. These books are much better bound, and printed on much better paper, than the junky "read-once" paperbacks you'll find in most bookstores. These are books made to be treasured, not skimmed and recycled.
Our books are all designed with generous interior margins, allowing you to read easily, without bending back the spine to make out words that run into the gutter.
Our cover art and any interior illustrations are all exclusively designed by authors and artists to our exact specifications. You'll never see one of our products with a boring, mass-produced cover designed by some hack who hasn't even read the book.
And best of all for our readers, we make our books as inexpensive as possible considering their high quality production. We typically make no royalties on our paperback books. That's right: when you order from Smashed-Rat-on-Press, you're getting your book at cost! (Plus postage, of course.) No frills, no price-padding. And it will be shipped to you directly from Lulu's print shop for the quickest possible delivery.
Don't bother to look for our work in stores. We are part of the avant-garde underground publishing industry, and we don't use ISBNs or bar-codes, so nobody will stock our work. You can only obtain these books directly by mail-order.
For all inquiries please write to rodent@smashed-rat-on-press.com and we will respond as soon as we can.
Click on a book cover to visit the order page for that book.
You can view a preview and get more specific details.
 $10.58 |
A Harlot of VenusJoin the beautiful Cavortia, her "friend" Magnanimo and a host of other colorful characters on a fast-paced erotic adventure through the land of Arcadia in western Mars. Arrests and escapes, sword fights and shipwrecks, evil merchants and honorable captains, and, of course, music, love, secret identities and sexual escapades... Originally published in 1996 by Masquerade Books, this erotic sci-fi swashbuckling classic has long been out-of-print. It is now available exclusively through us. Newly typeset on nice paper with a fabulous new cover by Christine M. Larsen, this edition also includes author's corrections and the two black-and-white maps of Mars that were missing from the original print edition. Don't miss it while supplies last! ♂ 6×9 trade size |
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 $11.34 |
A Dancer of ArgyreAt last, the long-awaited prequel to A Harlot of Venus! On the desolate plateau of Argyre in southern Mars, the arrogant village girl Beytkliye dreams of being a dancer in the big city. Halfway around the planet, the dreamer Pescadalio longs to explore the mysteries beyond his map's blank edges. Bolstered by hope they each set out, to be thwarted by kidnapping, slavery, leaky ships, and more. Pursuing separate dreams, they're on a collision course with destiny. This is our second volume with a fabulous new cover by Christine M. Larsen! ♂ 6×9 trade size |
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 $8.98 |
Ichresta, Volume 1: Baron Uteydrihk's DaughterIchresta, youngest child and only daughter of Baron Uteydrihk, wants nothing more than to be a soldier. She longs for the thrill of battle, to wield a sword; to follow in the footsteps of her ancestors, father, and brothers. This first part of the 3-volume novel follows Ichresta's life from the age of nine through eighteen: from the beginning of her formal tutelage under the priest Lhemekin, to her entry into society, in search of a husband to fulfill the promise made on her father's deathbed. Her intimate friend Meitya fears that if Ichresta gets married, she will be left behind. Volumes 2 and 3 of the series are currently in preparation. Another volume with a fabulous new cover by Christine M. Larsen! ♂ 6×9 trade size |
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 $7.00 print $3.75 download |
Ergot Suum and the Rampaging Ooze-Worm of Zupiter
Meet Ergot Suum, independent astro hero. His mission: transport Princess Gzeembo of Blazia to her home planet of Zupiter before estrus comes upon her, and earn an easy stack of galactic credit chips. The clock is ticking... And the fuel gauge is faulty. They are soon out of gas, drifting in space, hundreds of parsecs from civilization. There is nothing for Ergot to do but service Gzeembo's insatiable orifice at frequent intervals, and wait for rescue. They have plenty of wine. Will they run out of oxygen? Or be sexed to death? In the remote, pirate-infested spaceways of the Eastern Arm, who knows what can happen...
This edition has new cover art by
Michael J. Calhoun; graphicbrat. 6×9 trade size |
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 $9.78 |
Fumie's TeacupJunichi is a young fashion designer; his after-hours obsession is with the paintings of Renoir. Kazue, a woman adrift, toils by day in an office, devoting her spare time to doll houses and night life. In the vast urban sprawl of Tokyo, they meet as the prospective partners in an arranged marriage. After the relationship falls apart, their influence on one another continues, catalyzed by the juxtaposition of traditional and modern forces around them. Junichi comes under the influence of Fumie's teacup and soon their separate lives begin to change in unanticipated ways. This novel of modern Japan was first published in electronic form by Spectrum Press of Chicago in 1995. ● 4.25×6.88 pocket size |
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 $6.70 |
The Typographer's Left ShoeThe year is 1932. The typographer Jacob Brown, aged 51, once dreamed of having sons to carry on his trade, but has never married. Emily Weldon, the cobbler's daughter of eighteen, meets Mr Brown while delivering a new pair of shoes. Before long, Emily is assisting in the shop, and soon falls hopelessly in love. With such a vast difference in age, they are hardly an appropriate match. Perusing an old book of Ancient Remedies to learn of love potions, Emily prays they can be together, and calls upon heaven for assistance. ● 6×9 trade size |
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 $8.02 |
Majestic FreiksEnter a world of disfigured heroines, unicorns and dragons, lederhosen, halitosis, beautiful flawed robots, viking demigods, and clever leprechauns. In addition to ultra-modern re-tellings of two folk-tales you are bound to recognize, within these covers you will find four other original tales of magic and mystery. 4.25×6.88 pocket size |
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 $5.62 |
Exploring the Surrealist Haiku of Batsuo Mashō
This long-anticipated anthology brings us some of the best in Japanese surrealist haiku, a form for which, some have said, the world is not yet prepared. The volume begins with a biographical sketch to introduce the author, who may not be as familiar to English-speaking audiences as other haiku poets such as Onitsura and Buson. Each of the 26 poems is presented in the original Japanese, then in romanized Japanese as well as an artistic/literal translation. The whole is accompanied by copious notes.
4.25×6.88 pocket size |
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 $6.86 |
On the KlickitatAnother volume in our erotic series. On the ferry out from Anacortes, Caryn and Lorenz meet, and agree to spend a few days at his vacation home on San Juan Island. Christmas is coming. Perhaps romance is in the air. ● 6×9 trade size |
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 $9.46 |
Diane at FifteenThough upset about leaving Seattle for a small town in Central Washington, Diane is delighted to have the attic bedroom of her dreams. But no sooner is she settled in than she is confronted by the ghost of Warren Brannigan. In the middle of the 1970s "young" Warren still wears the quaint suit he died in, nearly sixty years before. As their unlikely friendship blossoms into intimacy, Diane begins to investigate the mysteries of Warren´s life. What became of his bride, Priscilla, after he was gunned down? Is she still alive? Together, Diane and her ghostly companion explore the variegated history of their house and the lives of its many former occupants. ● 4.25×6.88 pocket size |
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 $5.08 |
Apple Blossom DreamsThe Phillips twins, Aaron and Beck, grew up in Central Washington. They climbed rocks and had fun. They knew the local fruit stand lady. After high school, Aaron went to college and Beck stayed behind. Years later, a phone call from the sheriff brought Aaron home to pick up the pieces of a tragedy. Thus enmeshed unexpectedly in a different life, he began to dream of a magical girl. 5.25×8.5 digest size |
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 $10.70 |
Short Fiction, Volume 1, The Erotica (1989-1995)
This is volume one of a two volume set of short fiction. This volume
contains the erotica and exotica from the period 1989-1995. See volume 2
for general fiction.
4.25×6.88 pocket size |
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 $8.74 |
Short Fiction, Volume 2, Miscellania (1993-1995)
This is volume 2 of a two-volume set. This volume contains the author's
short general fiction, 1993-1995. 4.25×6.88 pocket size |
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Books marked with a red circle ● in our catalog are part of our Red Ai series of love stories and erotically themed works. Look for the Red 愛 logo on the back cover.
Books marked with the ♂ sign in our catalog are part of the erotic Martian Women series. Other volumes will follow in due course.
One of our special services is autographed copies. We can take payment via Paypal for the price of the book, plus postage and a couple dollars or so for the special handling, and arrange to ship you an autographed copy of one of our books. This isn't an instant service, and we can't sell you more than one or two of each book this way. We usually have only minimal inventory, so you may have to allow a couple of weeks for shipment. Write to us if you need an autographed copy, and we will give you friendly, personalized service and a quote. Show me a New York publisher who'll do that!
Seriously? You are welcome to send us your manuscript. If we like the beginning well enough to read the whole thing, we might consider publishing it, but we guarantee nothing, and probably won't. If you send us a manuscript, we will not retain it, but we might read it. We're more likely to send you an encouraging note and tell you to consider doing it yourself on Lulu.com. But we have been known to do typesetting and book layout for low-low prices, if we really like the work. And we might be able to point you to an artist who might consider doing your cover. Write to us: rodent@smashed-rat-on-press.com.
Last revision: March 1, 2010